Effective Coping with COVID-19

Mid March was the last time I was allowed to see my mother in person. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s 12 years ago. She has required 24/hr care for about three years now. Her ALF needs to protect all residents and so visits are limited to behind the sliding glass door.  Initially, I thought “this pandemic will pass,” but it just lingered. The pain of missing my mother is as excruciating as when I found out she had Alzheimer’s all those years ago.  I rely on mindfulness techniques and other positive coping skills to help decrease my own discomfort and anxieties. 

We all are struggling with collective trauma from this pandemic. It is impacting us in different ways. Some have past traumas and others are having present day experiences.Trauma is stored in our bodies and emotions. Just because your life is stable, it doesn’t mean that you are free from past pain. When the world around us becomes chaotic and unpredictable, it mimics the environment of trauma. It’s important to separate present day events from past experiences to be able to gain a healthier perspective of how to respond right now. 

Be kind and considerate to one another, because you never know what some else is going through. Take time to allow yourself to metabolize the painful experiences so that emotion does not get stuck in your body. Discomfort will not last forever, if properly processed. Remember positive self-talk is extremely effective in dealing with external events that are out of our control. For now, my mom is safe and very well taken care of and I am grateful for that.

Rachel Rowitt, Ed.D., LMHC,  CAP | Grace Counseling, Inc.

Courage, Dear Heart

This February 14 will forever be changed for the communities of Parkland and Coral Springs. Counseling is effective for coping with loss, but it does not lessen the permanent pain of losing loved ones. While the Douglas shooting was very prominent in the media, there are several people that will also be dealing with loss for the first time this Valentine’s Day. During this holiday of love, I can’t help but think about losses that I have experienced, and how the loved ones in my family have been adversely impacted.

Life is precious and unpredictable. We make decisions to take care of our mental and physical health; however, somethings cannot be anticipated. It takes a tremendous amount of courage to continue living life without your loved ones. Courage to continue being around family, friends and celebrating events while you know that part of you is still grieving.

For me, courage gives the ability to have faith that it will hurt less over time.  It is also equally as important to be able to talk about the pain of loss and allow yourself to grieve. There is no time limit to grief, and we shouldn’t enforce one, but we should allow the process to unfold as it should. This Valentine’s Day let’s cherish our loved ones that are still present and honor the memory of those whom we have lost.

Rachel Rowitt, Ed.D., LMHC, CAP | Grace Counseling, Inc. | Mental Health Blog in Coral Springs

Radical Acceptance as a Christian

Often we walk around things trying to figure out why or what's the purpose behind events in our lives. To solve the question of “why,” we use our problem solving skills which include rational and logical thinking. However, it is easy to get stuck in “why” when there is no resolution in sight. The truth is when we have faith in God; we really don't need to figure out “why.”

As Christians, we are instructed not to go down the ruminating path of “why.” This is to help prevent us from falling into fear of the unknown and/or into despair concerning issues from the past. Constant questioning can render us stagnant and prevent us from being used to our full potential for God’s glory.

Faith in God for the unknown and unseen, (Hebrews 11:1) is a skill and not a natural event. This type of faith, to me, involves practicing radical acceptance.

Rachel Rowitt | Grace Counseling, Inc.