Mid March was the
last time I was allowed to see my mother in person. She was diagnosed with early onset
Alzheimer’s 12 years ago. She has required 24/hr care for about three years
now. Her ALF needs to protect all residents and so visits are limited to behind
the sliding glass door. Initially, I thought “this
pandemic will pass,” but it just lingered. The pain of missing my mother is as
excruciating as when I found out she had Alzheimer’s all those years ago. I rely on mindfulness techniques and other positive
coping skills to help decrease my own discomfort and anxieties.
We all are struggling
with collective trauma from this pandemic. It is impacting us in different ways.
Some have past traumas and others are having present day experiences.Trauma is stored in
our bodies and emotions. Just because your life is stable, it doesn’t mean that
you are free from past pain. When the world around us becomes chaotic and
unpredictable, it mimics the environment of trauma. It’s important to separate
present day events from past experiences to be able to gain a healthier
perspective of how to respond right now.
Be kind and
considerate to one another, because you never know what some else is going
through. Take time to allow yourself to
metabolize the painful experiences so that emotion does not get stuck in your
body. Discomfort will not last forever, if properly processed. Remember
positive self-talk is extremely effective in dealing with external events that
are out of our control. For now, my mom is safe and very well taken care of and
I am grateful for that.
Rachel Rowitt, Ed.D., LMHC, CAP | Grace Counseling, Inc.
